I don't know if its possible for it to seem like time is flying, while at the same time feeling like the due date can't get here fast enough. This Sunday, we will be 4 weeks away from the official due date for our little girl. 4 weeks away means that Elise is fully developed and can now come out at any time and be healthy. 4 weeks feels so close, but also like an eternity. If you were to ask Erin, the time can't come soon enough. She has been feeling especially uncomfortable over the past few weeks. Nothing is easy anymore. It even seems that getting up off the couch is as difficult as running a marathon.
We had our day-long birth class a couple of weeks ago. It was a little overwhelming to say the least... way too visual. This coming from a guy who will always watch the movie instead of reading the book. I never want to see anyone other than my wife give birth. I'm not even sure if I want to see Erin do it. I want to be as far away from the downspout as possible. If the videos we watched in class are real, the miracle of birth appears closer to a slasher flick than a natural occurrence. I don't want to talk about that anymore. I'm sure you get the picture.
As the day draws near, I am truly beginning to get anxious. I am getting an idea of the imminent changes that are just around the corner. Occasionally, I will just walk into the nursery and stare into the empty crib. My thoughts swirl as I think about Elise just sleeping in there. I don't consider myself too much of a control freak, but I understand that a lot of what will happen over the next year will be completely out of my control, and this is slightly unsettling. What am I going to do when she cries for no reason and won't stop? This is really the only thing I am nervous about. The good does outweigh the bad in my mind, as I also think about her eyes lighting up when I play music for her for the first time.
Well, at this point I'm just rambling. Here is where it gets real. Everyday after Sunday could be the day. Each new day will bring with it a different type of preparation: mental, emotional, practical, etc. Please keep us in your prayers as we dive head first into the unknown. Because let's be honest, that is what is the most frightening...
